"(A cell of) rice appears to contain about 50,000 genes, compared with about 35,000 for humans." - The Wall Street Journal, April, 2002

HUMANS INSIST THEY ARE NOT DUMBER THAN RICE
Many Believed to Be Correct

Word that genetic researchers have discovered a cell of rice contains more genes than a human cell has caused widespread outrage as people across the globe attempt to prove that humans are easily as smart as a grain of rice.

In Edmonton, Canada, 34-year-old Alan Snigget was one of many average humans who devised intelligence tests to discredit the implication that rice is more evolved. The postal worker began by taping a grain of rice to a brick wall — "but lightly, so it could move if it had to" — then hopping behind the wheel of his 1994 Dodge pickup truck. After honking several times to give fair warning, Snigget drove at high speed directly into the rice. According to eyewitnesses, however, the rice never moved.

Said one Edmonton police officer who observed the scene: "Stupid rice."
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