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  Sunday  September 11  2005    09: 26 PM

elder care

I've been helping in the care for Zoe's mom, Gerry. She moved in with us almost a year ago with Alzheimer's. It's getting closer to the time she will need to move into assisted care living. She has become increasingly fearful, particularly at night. It's called sundowning. At times she doesn't remember that she lives here. She doesn't believe me when I tell her her bedroom is in the other room. When she goes in she sees her furniture and remembers. She remembers Zoe and I although, a couple of months ago, she woke up one morning and didn't know who I was. Her doctor adjusted her meds and things did get better. She becomes agitated when one of us leaves. Something in her world has changed and she doesn't know what and the fear increases. It has become more difficult to go down into the basement to work on projects like the darkroom since she becomes afraid when I am out. I can grab an hour or two in the morning but evenings are getting increasingly hard to do. It has given me an appreciation for what those who don't have family or can't afford medical care must go through. It's a nightmare that doesn't end. For me there is good news and bad news. The good news is that this will pass. The bad news is that this will pass. I get pretty maxed out at times but I'm not looking forward to her leaving. But all things do pass. It sucks.