| Today has been an (almost) rock-bottom day but not totally there yet, but close. I'm on the verge of a breakdown, nay, more to the point, I'm in the process of it. Today's session with Marilyn highlighted just how lost I am, and how much I am NOT functioning at this point of my life. It is debilitating to just "be". This isn't a pity-party entry -- au contraire, I don't have the umph to eek out an "oh woe is me...". I just am cried out, used up, fought-out (nope, no word from the atty. yet no matter the emails, the retainer, the signed forms, the phone calls -- nope, no word from my Rheum's office, no matter the many calls, re: the MRI, and to surger- or not surgery -- nope, no from US Bank re: their holding up for 5 more days the annuity that was surrendered -- nope, not able to look at places for Mom to live, to cull them out yet because if they ask questions, I don't have the answers yet because the atty hasn't contacted me...and so on and obladi-oblada yada yada yada & la di da!). I just hurt (therefore I'm alive?) but have severely blown my "head gasket" and soul gasket? and heart gasket and a tisket a tasket?
I need help here. And, to boot, the money just keeps on flowing out and my nest egg just keeps getting smaller and smaller and smaller with no forseeable way to refill the coffers. ..and I'm just so tired
sad
lost
ineffectual
impotent
blue n dragon...
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