| So, I stayed in bed this AM bordering on PM 'cuz my nightmare was so nasty and real feeling that I was too sad to wake up into the world my nightmare created. I had dreamt that Mom died and it is so lonely in this universe without her, hence my not wanting to come out of my sleep. I miss her terribly and hope she will be close to home so I can bring our new pussycat to her for her joy and love and more shared history before she is lost completely. So, there seems to be a theme pervading my treatments with Julie at Oriental Healing Arts, and with Marilyn...I'm grieving, big time. So, not such a surprise after all to have had this nightmare...and to my chagrin, the wall around my heart seems to be broken...so I cry a lot, and /or just feel heartbroken. It's too much feeling for too long of a time. Grief hurts and ends up in every aspect of my day. I can't describe the emptiness and ache and lower than low feeling about myself and life. Everything hurts...everything hurts...but there are moments with Bartholomew kitty that offer me a fullness in my heart for moments, and I can't thank Beverly enough for letting him into my life, her heart is just so huge and her empathy brilliant. Thank you so much my friend.
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