| It's been truly an e-ticket week, more than typical methinks. Shit hit the fan when I got a call first thing yesterday AM from WSH from the on-call doc who said that Mom had been unconscious for about 5 minutes, and they got her breathing again with oxygen, and would it e ok for Mom to go to St Clair:? I said yes, but do not let her get admitted. They wanted to have her get tests and CTscan etc. Not to have a repeat of last time she was in ST Clair, I phoned back to make sure that they took snacks, like a banana etc. to stave off any sugar drops and that awful feeling etc. I also made sure that they did indeed make sure that Mom's appropriate records went with her. I was told that there were strict instructions given, with the records, to the EMTs, and that there were snacks sent with the person from WSH who accompanied Mom in the separate car. When I phoned the ER, I was ultimately transferred to Laura. She was very knowledgeable, and helpful. After each call, and information, I would then ask when it would be best to call back, and was told what she thought would be best, so there was mutual respect, as I didn't want to do it to the point of annoyance, but entrez-nous, if things changed, I would certainly step up to the plate and make sure I made noise until I got what I needed, but there was no need this time. Gordy and I had chatted at first call, and we were ready to drive down to see Mom, but we were both still so exhausted, and my back kept seizing up, 'smatter o' fact, pain to the point of screaming, and not being able to stand upright at all...and I had no clue what part of me was keeping me bent. It was very very scary. So, I told Gordy to go back to sleep while I do some phoning and "Ground work". In the meantime I did call Marilyn, and we came up with a game plan, if nothing by noon, I'm going down. It was good to unload to her, and have a huge, scary, cry. With that in mind, the fear and waiting continued. And, guilts about not being there, but as Marilyn kept reminding me, that I need to "take the oxygen" so I can be there for Mom. I know the logic, but the reality stinks. Well, they found nothing wrong from the labs, and Mom apparently refused to let the CTscan happen, and they chose not to sedate her [yes!] so when I phoned the last time, they said she was walking the ward [which was taboo last time...] but she kept stopping every few feet and was tired. That is so not like her at all. That concerned me. She made it back, and did well soon after she was back in her place familiar. The moral to this story (besides Mom being home and appearing to be typical for her of late) is that the elevating of the last time at St Clair and having chats with the "right" people, truly did make a positive impact, and she was cared for in a much better and personalized way. But, OTOH, I hate this. I hate her having to go through this, and the last few times we visited has been all about her being afraid, scared, anxious, lonely, unhappy, unable to speak, and wanting to leave and come home. Monday, during our visit, she had a new mannerism that she was trying to use to express something very very important to her, and at one time she said she was feeling "nutsy" which isn't goodness. No matter the question posed to her, in so many different ways, I did not get through to her and get a "gestalt" that "this is the problem"...so to help her, and /or solve it, never came to fore, and I just feel like crap for not being able to get to the core of it. Oh I hate this.
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